– Sich nicht mehr alles gefallen lassen

  sich nicht mehr ausnutzen lassen

– Grenzen setzen

– Respekt einfordern

– mehr für uns selbst sorgen

das wäre schön.

 

Leider gibt es auch die andere Seite der Medaille.

– Angst, nicht mehr gemocht zu werden

– Angst vor Ärger

– vor Ausgrenzung

– vor persönlichen oder beruflichen Nachteilen

– verlassen zu werden

– alleine zu sein.

 

All diese Ängste sind aufgrund unserer Erfahrungen und unserer Biografie verständlich. Das heißt nicht, dass sie jetzt noch aktuell sein müssen.

Wenn ich einem Bekannten einen Gefallen verweigere, kann es sein, dass er sauer auf mich ist.

Das mag sich im ersten Moment bedrohlich anfühlen, aber ist es das wirklich? In den allermeisten Fällen nicht.

Interessanterweise werden Personen, die klar nein sagen, sogar als ranghöher und respekteinflößender wahrgenommen.

 

Was kann man also tun, um konkret etwas zu verändern?

 

Die wichtigste Grundlage ist, dass du dich stark und wohl in deiner Haut fühlst. Das geht leichter, wenn du das Gefühl in dir aktivierst:

Wann hattest du dein letztes oder dein schönstes Erfolgserlebnis? Wie hat sich das angefühlt? Wie war deine Körperhaltung dabei? Lass dir Zeit und stelle es dir genau vor, am besten mit allen Sinnen. Was gab es da zu sehen, hören, fühlen, vielleicht sogar zu riechen oder zu schmecken?

Wenn du dann das nächste Mal gefragt wirst:

– nimm gedanklich Kontakt zu deinem Erfolgserlebnis auf

– bitte ggf. um Bedenkzeit, um genau zu prüfen, ob oder was du antworten möchtest.

– Sage nur „Nein“ oder dass dieser Gefallen nur zu den und den Bedingungen gilt, ohne Erklärung oder Rechtfertigung

– Wechsle anschließend das Thema

 

Und denke daran: Übung macht den Meister! 

Probiere deine neue Fähigkeit zuerst an weniger wichtigen Themen, bevor du dich an die Top-Herausforderungen wagst.

Viel Erfolg!

12.403 Antworten

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